"There is no such thing as accident; it is fate misnamed."--Napoleon Bonaparte
Today is not only the first of January, but it is also the day that I leave for London. By this time tomorrow I will be in the city that I have dreamed of more most of my life. It seems strange to me, and I cannot really truly comprehend it. I have a feeling that it will not feel real to me until I am staring Big Ben in the face. Just like when I was in Russia, I had to touch the red walls of the Kremlin before I could really believe that I was there.
Something that has always interested me is, as the title suggests, fate and freewill. Now, you are probably wondering what this has to do with London (do not worry, I will get there eventually). Last semester I took a class about Harry Potter and in the textbook there was a section about fate. Are we the masters of our own destiny or what we are going to do already planned out, and nothing we can do will change it. In Harry Potter, as in most literature, a thousand things have to go right and happen exactly in order for current things to happen. Granted, people could say then it would not be the same story, something would have happened, or it would have been fine anyway. Shakespeare, the Bard, seemed to think that we had no control over fate. When the Witches tell Macbeth the prophecies, he tries to avert them, but they all come true anyway.
Do we have control over our own destinies? I am not saying that we should just sit by and let things happen, let ourselves starve. I am asking if we choose are fates or if they happen with or without or consent. For example, Mary walks into a cafe to get coffee and meets John, they date, fall in love, get married, blah blah blah...was Mary supposed to meet John? Or, would it be different if she decided not to get coffee and went to work without it? Would she have met John somewhere else? Now, you are are definitely bored of my ramblings. I am sorry, this is the weird things that go through my mind. Was I supposed to go to London? Is it an essential part of my life story. I feel that it is very important, that I was meant to go there, that it is change things. My friends say it is because I am going to meet my future husband over there. Relax Mom and Dad, the odds of that happening are slim to none. But, did I choose this path or was it meant to happen? I have longed for London so long, that perhaps I just knew that I would get there eventually. Or, have I longed for it because I was meant to go there? When I am over there though, I want to do so many things and make so many friends(most of them English). I am young and I have a lot of life to come after this, but I cannot help but feel like something wonderful is going to happen. Whether that is the travelling and fun that I have over there or if I am going to marry Prince Harry, I do not know. I just cannot help but feel so nervous and excited. Nervous, not because I am leaving everything behind, but because I want so much to happen. I have so many plans and grand dreams, and I am afraid that they will not happen. I am determined though to make them happen...at least some of them, the ones that are actually possible. Well...thank you for listening to my rant, I am know that it was not much despite its length. Sorry for all the questions, that is just my mind. I have been planning this post for days, but I only now got the courage to admit it. Sometimes I wish that I could speed up or slow down time. No matter what I do though, time passes, for better or for worse. London is staring me in the face, but it still does not feel real though. We will see how real it feels tomorrow though. Happy New Year! May 2013 be everything you want it to be and more.
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